The public are aware that this important national undertaking, which is now about to be commenced, is to be a prodigious cast-iron light-house on the Goodwin Sands.  Peter Borthwick and our Sibby are already candidates for the office of universal illuminators.  Peter rests his claims chiefly on the brilliancy of his ideas, as exemplified in his plan for lighting the metropolis with bottled moonshine; while Sib. proudly refers to our columns for imperishable evidences of the intensity of his wit, conscious that these alone would entitle him to be called “the light of all nations.”  We trust that Sir Robert Peel will exercise a sound discretion in bestowing this important situation.  Highly as we esteem Peter’s dazzling talents—­profoundly as we admire his bottled moonshine scheme—­we feel there is no man in the world more worthy of being elevated to the lantern than our refulgent friend Sibthorp.

* * * * *

A SHORT TREATISE OF DRAMATIC CASUALTIES.

VERY PROFITABLE TO READ.

Let our Treatise of Dramatic Casualties be that which treateth of the misfortunes contingent upon the profession of dramatic authors.  Now, of unfortunate dramatic authors there be two grand kinds—­namely, they that be unfortunate before the production of their works, and they that be unfortunate after the production of their works.

And first, among them that be unfortunate before the production of their works may he enumerated—­

    1.—­He that, having but one manuscript of his piece leaveth the
        same with the manager for inspection, and it falleth out that
        he seeth it no more, neither heareth thereof.

    2.—­He that having translated a piece from the French, and bestowed
        thereon much time, findeth himself forestalled.

    3.—­He that, having written a pantomime, carrieth it in his pocket,
        and straight there cometh a dishonest person, who, taking the
        same, selleth it for waste paper.

    4.—­He that presenteth his piece to all the theatres in succession,
        and lo! it ever returneth, accompanied with a polite note
        expressive of disapprobation or the like.

    5.—­He whose piece is approved by the manager, but, nevertheless,
        the same produceth it not, for divers reasons, which do vary at
        every interview.

    6.—­He that communicateth the idea of a yet unwritten drama to a
        friend, who, being of a fair wit, and prompt withal, useth the
        same to his own ends and reapeth the harvest thereof.

And secondly, of them that be unfortunate after the production of their works, there be some whose pieces are successful, and there be some whose pieces are not successful.

And firstly, of unfortunate authors whose pieces are unsuccessful there be—­