1001 Questions and Answers on Orthography and Reading eBook
B. A. Hathaway
3. These peremptory tripartite brethren arrived
at Greenwich, wishing to aggrandize themselves by
indulging in exemplary relaxation, indicatory of implacable
detestation of integral tergiversation and exoteric
intrigue. They fraternized with a phrenological
harlequin who was a connoisseur in mezzotint and falconry.
The piquant person was heaping contumely and scathing
raillery on an amateur in jugular recitative, who
held that the Pharaohs of Asia were conversant with
his theory that morphine and quinine were exorcists
of bronchitis.
4. Meanwhile, the leisurely Augustine of Cockburn
drank from a tortoise-shell wassail cup to the health
of an apotheosized recusant, who was his supererogatory
patron, and an assistant recognizance in the immobile
nomenclature of interstitial molecular phonics.
The contents of the vase proving soporific, a stolid
plebeian took from its cerements a heraldic violoncello,
and, assisted by a plethoric diocesan from Pall Mall,
who performed on a sonorous piano-forte, proceeded
to wake the clangorous echoes of the Empyrean.
They bade the prolyx Caucasian gentlemen not to misconstrue
their inexorable demands, while they dined on acclimated
anchovies and apricot truffles, and had for dessert
a wiseacre’s pharmacopoeia. Thus the truculent
Pythagoreans had a novel repast fit for the gods.
5. On the subsidence of the feast they alternated
between soft languors and isolated scenes of squalor,
which followed a mechanist’s reconnaissance
of the imagery of Uranus, the legend of whose incognito
related to a poniard wound in the abdomen received
while cutting a swath in the interests of telegraphy
and posthumous photography. Meantime an unctuous
orthoepist applied a homeopathic restorative to the
retina of an objurgatory spaniel (named Daniel) and
tried to perfect the construction of a behemoth which
had got mired in pygmean slough, while listening to
the elegiac soughing of the prehistoric wind.
SELECT READING.
1. Geoffrey, surnamed Winthrop, sat in the depot
at Chicago, waiting for his train and reading the
Tribune, when a squadron of street Arabs (incomparable
for squalor) thronged from a neighboring alley, uttering
hideous cries, accompanied by inimitable gestures of
heinous exultation, as they tortured a humble black-and-tan
dog.
2. “You little blackguards!” cried
Winthrop, stepping outside and confronting them, adding
the inquiry, “Whose dog is that?”
3. “That audacious Caucasian has the bravado
to interfere with our clique,” tauntingly shrieked
the indisputable little ruffian, exhibiting combativeness.
4. “What will you take for him?”
asked the lenient Geoffrey, ignoring the venial tirade.
5. “Twenty-seven cents,” piquantly
answered the ribald urchin, grabbing the crouching
dog by the nape.
6. “You can buy licorice and share with
the indecorous coadjutors of your condemnable cruelty,”
said Winthrop, paying the price and taking the dog
from the child. Then catching up his valise and
umbrella he hastened to his train. Winthrop satisfied
himself that his sleek protege was not wounded, and
then cleaned the cement from the pretty collar, and
read these words; “Leicester. Licensed,
No. 1880.”