Title:  Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 152, January 3, 1917

Author:  Various

Release Date:  October 31, 2004 [EBook #13903]

Language:  English

Character set encoding:  ASCII

*** Start of this project gutenberg EBOOK punch ***

Produced by Jonathan Ingram, William Flis and the Online Distributed
Proofreading Team.

PUNCH,

Or the London charivari.

Vol. 152.

January 3, 1917.

[Illustration:  Vol.  Clii.]

* * * * *

More discipline.

“Yes, Sir,” said Sergeant Wally, accepting one of my cigarettes and readjusting his wounded leg,—­“yes, Sir, discipline’s the thing.  It’s only when a man moves on the word o’ command, without waiting to think, that he becomes a really reliable soldier.  I remember, when I was a recruit, how they put us through it.  I’d been on the square about a week.  I was a fairly smart youngster, and I thought I was jumping to it just like an old soldier, when the drill sergeant called me out of the ranks.  Look ‘ere,’ he said, ’if you think you’re going to make a fool o’ me, standing about there till you choose to obey the word o’ command, you’ve made a big mistake.’  I could ‘a’ cried at the time, but I’ve been glad often enough since for what the sergeant said that day.  I’ve found that little bit of gag useful myself many a time.”

I was meditating with sympathy upon the many victims of Sergeant Wally’s borrowed sarcasm when he spoke again.

“When I first came up to London from the depôt,” he said, “I’d a brother, a corporal in the same battalion.  You know as well as I do, Sir, that as a matter o’ discipline a corporal doesn’t have any truck with a private soldier, excepting in the way of duties, and my brother didn’t speak to me for the first week.  Then one day he called me up and said, ’It ain’t the thing for me to be going about with you, but as you’re my brother I’ll go out with you to-night.  Have yourself cleaned by six o’clock.’

“Well, I took all the money I’d got—­about twelve bob—­and off we went.

“We had a bit o’ supper first at a place my brother knew of, and a very good supper it was.  My brother ordered it, but I paid.  Then we got a couple of cigars—­at least, I did.  Then we went to a music-hall, me paying, of course.  We had a drink during the evening, and when we came out my brother said, ‘We’d better come in here and have a snack.’

“‘Well, I ain’t got any money left,’ I sez.  My brother looked at me a minute, and then he said, ’I don’t know what I’ve been thinking of, going about with you, you a private and me a corporal.  Be off ‘ome !’ And he stalks away.

“Yes, Sir, discipline’s the thing.  Thank you, I’ll have another cigarette.”