Calling him an old blower and bloat, a gas-bag and fanfaron, a Gascon and a carajo, alma miserabile, and a pudding-head, a sacre menteur and a verfluchte prahlerische Hauptesel, a brassy old blunder-head and a spupsy, un sot sans pareil and a darned old hoffmagander; a pepper-pot-pourri, a thafe of the wurreld and an owld baste, the divil’s blissing an him!
In French, English, Dutch, Spanish and Irish, Yankee and Creole, yea, even in Nigger and in Natchez Indian, reviled they him.
And the rumor thereof went abroad into all lands, that HOLLINS had been compelled to hand in his horns.
How are the mighty fallen, how is he that was exalted cut down in his salary!
Beware, oh my son, that thou pullest not the long bow ere the bowstring be twisted, or ever the arrow be at hand—send not in thy bill ere the customer have bought the goods.
Sell not the skin ere thou catchest the bear, and give not out thy wedding cards before thou hast popped the question.
For all these things did HOLLINS—verily he hath his reward.
* * * * *
CHRISTOPHER NORTH, in Blackwood, and many others since him, have popularized this style of chronicle-English of the sixteenth century, and our contributor has sound precedent for his imitations. ’Should time permit, nor the occasion fail,’ we trust to have him with us in the following number. Our thanks are due to some scores of cotemporaries who have republished the last Chronicle, and for the praise which they lavished on it.
* * * * *
To HENRY P. LELAND we are indebted for a
SONNET TO JOHN JONES.
Thou who dost walk round town, not quite
unknown,
I have a word to speak within
thy ear.
Hast thou no dread to hear in trumpet
tone
’John Jones has got
a contract!’—dost not fear
Thy children, yet unborn, may then disown
The parent, with whose name
they thus may hear
Transactions worse than usury’s
heaviest loan
Of twenty odd per cent. and
more a year?
Oh, John! I pray thee that within
thy heart
The lesson that ‘Police
Court’ teaches thee,
That other Jones’ rob hen-roosts,
and take part
In many a rousing fight and
drunken spree,
May have its influence; and that thou
wilt start
And have thy name changed,
quickly as may be.
Who has not had his attention called to the small, black carpet-bags which so greatly prevail in this very traveling community? Who has not heard of mistakes which have occurred owing to their frequency and similarity, and who in fact has not lost one himself? That these mistakes may sometimes lead to merrily-moving, serio-comic results, is set forth, not badly, as it seems to us, in the following story:—