I took the hint:  it never once occurred to me, that if I had fairly and candidly stated to my parents that my stock of clothes were insufficient for my appearance as a gentleman on the quarter-deck, that they would cheerfully have increased it to any reasonable extent.  But I had been taught artifice and cunning; I could tell the truth where I thought it served my purpose, as well as a lie; but here I thought deception was a proof at once of spirit and of merit; and I resolved to practise it, if only to raise myself a trifling degree in the estimation of my unworthy associates.  I had become partial to deception from habit, and preferred exercising my own ingenuity in outwitting my father, to obtaining what I needed by more straightforward and honourable measures.

The ship needed some repairs, and by the indulgence of the captain, who was pleased with my conduct, I, who required so much instruction in the nature and cause of her defects, was allowed to be absent while they were made good.  By this oversight, I lost all that improvement which I should have gained by close attention to the unrigging or shipping of the ship; the manner of returning her stores; taking out her masts and ballast, and seeing her taken into dock; the shape of her bottom, and the good or bad qualities which might be supposed to accelerate or retard her movements.  All this was sacrificed to the impatience of seeing my parents; to the vainglory of boasting of the action in which I had been present; and, perhaps, of being encouraged to tell lies of things which I never saw, and to talk of feats which I never performed.  I loved effect; and I timed the moment of my return to my father’s house (through a correspondence with my sister) to be just as a large party had sat down to a sumptuous dinner.  I had only been absent three months, it is true; but it was my first cruise, and then “I had seen so much, and been in such very interesting situations.”

Chapter IV

    ’Twill be time to go home.  What shall I say I have done?  It must
    be a very plausive invention that carries it.  I find my tongue is
    too foolhardy.—­SHAKESPEARE.

Reaching the well known mansion of my father, I knocked softly at the front door, was admitted, and, without saying a word to the servant, rushed to the head of the dining-room table, and threw my arms round my mother’s neck, who only screamed, “Good heavens, my child!” and fell into hysterics.  My father, who was in the very midst of helping his soup, jumped up to embrace me and assist my mother.  The company all rose, like a covey of partridges:  one lady spoiled a new pink satin gown by a tip of the elbow from her next neighbour, just as a spoonful of soup had reached “the rosy portals of her mouth;” the little spaniel, Carlo, set up a loud and incessant bark; and in one minute the whole comely arrangement of the feast was converted into anarchy and confusion.