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This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 156 pages of information about Cobwebs from an Empty Skull.

He banked his fires, and in six weeks was as cold as a neglected pudding.  Then might you have seen the heaving of the surface boulders, as the people began stirring forty fathoms beneath.

When you have got quite enough of anything, make it manifest by asking for some more.  You won’t get it.

CI.

“I entertain for you a sentiment of profound amity,” said the tiger to the leopard.  “And why should I not? for are we not members of the same great feline family?”

“True,” replied the leopard, who was engaged in the hopeless endeavour to change his spots; “since we have mutually plundered one another’s hunting grounds of everything edible, there remains no grievance to quarrel about.  You are a good fellow; let us embrace!”

They did so with the utmost heartiness; which being observed by a contiguous monkey, that animal got up a tree, where he delivered himself of the wisdom following: 

“There is nothing so touching as these expressions of mutual regard between animals who are vulgarly believed to hate one another.  They render the brief intervals of peace almost endurable to both parties.  But the difficulty is, there are so many excellent reasons why these relatives should live in peace, that they won’t have time to state them all before the next fight.”

CII.

A woodpecker, who had bored a multitude of holes in the body of a dead tree, was asked by a robin to explain their purpose.

“As yet, in the infancy of science,” replied the woodpecker, “I am quite unable to do so.  Some naturalists affirm that I hide acorns in these pits; others maintain that I get worms out of them.  I endeavoured for some time to reconcile the two theories; but the worms ate my acorns, and then would not come out.  Since then, I have left science to work out its own problems, while I work out the holes.  I hope the final decision may be in some way advantageous to me; for at my nest I have a number of prepared holes which I can hammer into some suitable tree at a moment’s notice.  Perhaps I could insert a few into the scientific head.”

“No-o-o,” said the robin, reflectively, “I should think not.  A prepared hole is an idea; I don’t think it could get in.”

MORAL.—­It might be driven in with a steam-hammer.

CIII.

“Are you going to this great hop?” inquired a spruce cricket of a labouring beetle.

“No,” replied he, sadly, “I’ve got to attend this great ball.”

“Blest if I know the difference,” drawled a more offensive insect, with his head in an empty silk hat; “and I’ve been in society all my life.  But why was I not invited to either hop or ball?”

He is now invited to the latter.

CIV.

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