A DEMOCRATIC HYMN.

  Republicans of differing views
    Are pro or con protection;
  If that’s the issue they would choose,
    Why, we have no objection. 
  The issue we propose concerns
    Our hearts and homes more nearly: 
  A wife to whom the nation turns
    And venerates so dearly. 
  So, confident of what shall be,
    Our gallant host advances,
  Giving three cheers for Grover C.
    And three times three for Frances!

  So gentle is that honored dame,
    And fair beyond all telling,
  The very mention of her name
    Sets every breast to swelling. 
  She wears no mortal crown of gold—­
    No courtiers fawn around her—­
  But with their love young hearts and old
    In loyalty have crowned her—­
  And so with Grover and his bride
    We’re proud to take our chances,
  And it’s three times three for the twain give we—­
    But particularly for Frances!

THE BLUE AND THE GRAY.

  The Blue and the Gray collided one day
    In the future great town of Missouri,
  And if all that we hear is the truth, ’twould appear
    That they tackled each other with fury.

  While the weather waxed hot they hove and they sot,
    Like the scow in the famous old story,
  And what made the fight an enjoyable sight
    Was the fact that they fought con amore.

  They as participants fought in such wise as was taught,
    As beseemed the old days of the dragons,
  When you led to the dance and defended with lance
    The damsel you pledged in your flagons.

  In their dialect way the knights of the Gray
    Gave a flout at the buckeye bandana,
  And the buckeye came back with a gosh-awful whack,
    And that’s what’s the matter with Hannah.

  This resisted attack took the Grays all a-back,
    And feeling less coltish and frisky,
  They resolved to elate the cause of their state,
    And also their persons, with whisky.

  Having made ample use of the treacherous juice,
    Which some folks say stings like an adder,
  They went back again at the handkerchief men,
    Who slowly got madder and madder.

  You can bet it was h—­l in the Southern Hotel
    And elsewhere, too many to mention,
  But the worst of it all was achieved in the hall
    Where the President held his convention.

  They ripped and they hewed and they, sweating imbrued,
    Volleyed and bellowed and thundered;
  There was nothing to do until these yawpers got through,
    So the rest of us waited and wondered.

  As the result of these frays it appears that the Grays,
    Who once were as chipper as daisies,
  Have changed their complexion to one of dejection,
    And at present are bluer than blazes.