The Spectator, Volumes 1, 2 and 3 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 3,418 pages of information about The Spectator, Volumes 1, 2 and 3.
Town, and which I hear will be continued with Additions and Improvements.  As all the Persons who compose this lawless Assembly are masqued, we dare not attack any of them in our Way, lest we should send a Woman of Quality to Bridewell, or a Peer of Great-Britain to the Counter:  Besides, that their Numbers are so very great, that I am afraid they would be able to rout our whole Fraternity, tho’ we were accompanied with all our Guard of Constables.  Both these Reasons which secure them from our Authority, make them obnoxious to yours; as both their Disguise and their Numbers will give no particular Person Reason to think himself affronted by you.
If we are rightly inform’d, the Rules that are observed by this new Society are wonderfully contriv’d for the Advancement of Cuckoldom.  The Women either come by themselves, or are introduced by Friends, who are obliged to quit them upon their first Entrance, to the Conversation of any Body that addresses himself to them.  There are several Rooms where the Parties may retire, and, if they please, show their Faces by Consent.  Whispers, Squeezes, Nods, and Embraces, are the innocent Freedoms of the Place.  In short, the whole Design of this libidinous Assembly seems to terminate in Assignations and Intrigues; and I hope you will take effectual Methods, by your publick Advice and Admonitions, to prevent such a promiscuous Multitude of both Sexes from meeting together in so clandestine a Manner.’

  I am,

  Your humble Servant,

  And Fellow Labourer,

  T. B.

Not long after the Perusal of this Letter I received another upon the same Subject; which by the Date and Stile of it, I take to be written by some young Templer.

  Middle Temple, 1710-11.

  SIR,

When a Man has been guilty of any Vice or Folly, I think the best Attonement he can make for it is to warn others not to fall into the like.  In order to this I must acquaint you, that some Time in February last I went to the Tuesday’s Masquerade.  Upon my first going in I was attacked by half a Dozen female Quakers, who seemed willing to adopt me for a Brother; but, upon a nearer Examination, I found they were a Sisterhood of Coquets, disguised in that precise Habit.  I was soon after taken out to dance, and, as I fancied, by a Woman of the first Quality, for she was very tall, and moved gracefully.  As soon as the Minuet was over, we ogled one another through our Masques; and as I am very well read in Waller, I repeated to her the four following Verses out of his poem to Vandike.

    ’The heedless Lover does not know
    Whose Eyes they are that wound him so;
    But confounded with thy Art,
    Enquires her Name that has his Heart.’

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The Spectator, Volumes 1, 2 and 3 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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