A little while after Pantagruel heard news that his
father Gargantua had been translated into the land
of the fairies by Morgue, as heretofore were Ogier
and Arthur; as also, (In the original edition it stands
’together, and that.’—M.) that
the report of his translation being spread abroad,
the Dipsodes had issued out beyond their borders,
with inroads had wasted a great part of Utopia, and
at that very time had besieged the great city of the
Amaurots. Whereupon departing from Paris without
bidding any man farewell, for the business required
diligence, he came to Rouen.
Now Pantagruel in his journey seeing that the leagues
of that little territory about Paris called France
were very short in regard of those of other countries,
demanded the cause and reason of it from Panurge, who
told him a story which Marotus of the Lac, monachus,
set down in the Acts of the Kings of Canarre, saying
that in old times countries were not distinguished
into leagues, miles, furlongs, nor parasangs, until
that King Pharamond divided them, which was done in
manner as followeth. The said king chose at
Paris a hundred fair, gallant, lusty, brisk young men,
all resolute and bold adventurers in Cupid’s
duels, together with a hundred comely, pretty, handsome,
lovely and well-complexioned wenches of Picardy, all
which he caused to be well entertained and highly
fed for the space of eight days. Then having
called for them, he delivered to every one of the young
men his wench, with store of money to defray their
charges, and this injunction besides, to go unto divers
places here and there. And wheresoever they
should biscot and thrum their wenches, that, they setting
a stone there, it should be accounted for a league.
Thus went away those brave fellows and sprightly
blades most merrily, and because they were fresh and
had been at rest, they very often jummed and fanfreluched
almost at every field’s end, and this is the
cause why the leagues about Paris are so short.
But when they had gone a great way, and were now
as weary as poor devils, all the oil in their lamps
being almost spent, they did not chink and duffle so
often, but contented themselves (I mean for the men’s
part) with one scurvy paltry bout in a day, and this
is that which makes the leagues in Brittany, Delanes,
Germany, and other more remote countries so long.
Other men give other reasons for it, but this seems
to me of all other the best. To which Pantagruel
willingly adhered. Parting from Rouen, they arrived
at Honfleur, where they took shipping, Pantagruel,
Panurge, Epistemon, Eusthenes, and Carpalin.
In which place, waiting for a favourable wind, and
caulking their ship, he received from a lady of Paris,
which I (he) had formerly kept and entertained a good
long time, a letter directed on the outside thus,
—To the best beloved of the fair women,
and least loyal of the valiant men —P.N.T.G.R.L.
