Gargantua and Pantagruel eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 952 pages of information about Gargantua and Pantagruel.
of London call the ferkers in and in.  As for breaking his head with over-much study, he had an especial care not to do it in any case, for fear of spoiling his eyes.  Which he the rather observed, for that it was told him by one of his teachers, there called regents, that the pain of the eyes was the most hurtful thing of any to the sight.  For this cause, when he one day was made a licentiate, or graduate in law, one of the scholars of his acquaintance, who of learning had not much more than his burden, though instead of that he could dance very well and play at tennis, made the blazon and device of the licentiates in the said university, saying,

  So you have in your hand a racket,
  A tennis-ball in your cod-placket,
  A Pandect law in your cap’s tippet,
  And that you have the skill to trip it
  In a low dance, you will b’ allowed
  The grant of the licentiate’s hood.

Chapter 2.VI.

How Pantagruel met with a Limousin, who too affectedly did counterfeit the French language.

Upon a certain day, I know not when, Pantagruel walking after supper with some of his fellow-students without that gate of the city through which we enter on the road to Paris, encountered with a young spruce-like scholar that was coming upon the same very way, and, after they had saluted one another, asked him thus, My friend, from whence comest thou now?  The scholar answered him, From the alme, inclyte, and celebrate academy, which is vocitated Lutetia.  What is the meaning of this? said Pantagruel to one of his men.  It is, answered he, from Paris.  Thou comest from Paris then, said Pantagruel; and how do you spend your time there, you my masters the students of Paris?  The scholar answered, We transfretate the Sequan at the dilucul and crepuscul; we deambulate by the compites and quadrives of the urb; we despumate the Latial verbocination; and, like verisimilary amorabons, we captat the benevolence of the omnijugal, omniform and omnigenal feminine sex.  Upon certain diecules we invisat the lupanares, and in a venerian ecstasy inculcate our veretres into the penitissime recesses of the pudends of these amicabilissim meretricules.  Then do we cauponisate in the meritory taberns of the Pineapple, the Castle, the Magdalene, and the Mule, goodly vervecine spatules perforaminated with petrocile.  And if by fortune there be rarity or penury of pecune in our marsupies, and that they be exhausted of ferruginean metal, for the shot we dimit our codices and oppignerat our vestments, whilst we prestolate the coming of the tabellaries from the Penates and patriotic Lares.  To which Pantagruel answered, What devilish language is this?  By the Lord, I think thou art some kind of heretick.  My lord, no, said the scholar; for libentissimally, as soon as it illucesceth any minutule slice of the day, I demigrate into one of these so well architected minsters, and there, irrorating myself with fair lustral

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Gargantua and Pantagruel from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.