Gargantua and Pantagruel eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 952 pages of information about Gargantua and Pantagruel.
well moistened in this house with the sweet wine and must.  By G—­, I drink to all men freely, and at all fords, like a proctor or promoter’s horse.  Friar John, said Gymnast, take away the snot that hangs at your nose.  Ha, ha, said the monk, am not I in danger of drowning, seeing I am in water even to the nose?  No, no, Quare?  Quia, though some water come out from thence, there never goes in any; for it is well antidoted with pot-proof armour and syrup of the vine-leaf.

Oh, my friend, he that hath winter-boots made of such leather may boldly fish for oysters, for they will never take water.  What is the cause, said Gargantua, that Friar John hath such a fair nose?  Because, said Grangousier, that God would have it so, who frameth us in such form and for such end as is most agreeable with his divine will, even as a potter fashioneth his vessels.  Because, said Ponocrates, he came with the first to the fair of noses, and therefore made choice of the fairest and the greatest.  Pish, said the monk, that is not the reason of it, but, according to the true monastical philosophy, it is because my nurse had soft teats, by virtue whereof, whilst she gave me suck, my nose did sink in as in so much butter.  The hard breasts of nurses make children short-nosed.  But hey, gay, Ad formam nasi cognoscitur ad te levavi.  I never eat any confections, page, whilst I am at the bibbery.  Item, bring me rather some toasts.

Chapter 1.XLI.

How the Monk made Gargantua sleep, and of his hours and breviaries.

Supper being ended, they consulted of the business in hand, and concluded that about midnight they should fall unawares upon the enemy, to know what manner of watch and ward they kept, and that in the meanwhile they should take a little rest the better to refresh themselves.  But Gargantua could not sleep by any means, on which side soever he turned himself.  Whereupon the monk said to him, I never sleep soundly but when I am at sermon or prayers.  Let us therefore begin, you and I, the seven penitential psalms, to try whether you shall not quickly fall asleep.  The conceit pleased Gargantua very well, and, beginning the first of these psalms, as soon as they came to the words Beati quorum they fell asleep, both the one and the other.  But the monk, for his being formerly accustomed to the hour of claustral matins, failed not to awake a little before midnight, and, being up himself, awaked all the rest, in singing aloud, and with a full clear voice, the song: 

  Awake, O Reinian, ho, awake! 
    Awake, O Reinian, ho! 
  Get up, you no more sleep must take;
    Get up, for we must go.

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Gargantua and Pantagruel from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.