Sacred and Profane Love eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 234 pages of information about Sacred and Profane Love.

Sacred and Profane Love eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 234 pages of information about Sacred and Profane Love.

I passed into a narrow hall, with an empty hat-rack, and so into the surgery.  From the back of the house came the sound of a piano—­scales, played very slowly.  The surgery was empty.  I noticed a card with letters of the alphabet printed on it in different sizes; and then the piano ceased, and there was the humming of an air in the passage, and a tall man in a frock-coat, slippered and spectacled, came into the surgery.

‘Good-evening, madam,’ he said gruffly.  ‘Won’t you sit down?’

‘I—­I—­I want to ask you—­’

He put a chair for me, and I dropped into it.

‘There!’ he said, after a moment.  ’You felt as if you might faint, didn’t you?’

I nodded.  The tears came into my eyes.

‘I thought so,’ he said.  ’I’ll just give you a draught, if you don’t mind.’

He busied himself behind me, and presently I was drinking something out of a conical-shaped glass.

My heart beat furiously, but I felt strong.

‘I want you to tell me, doctor,’ I spoke firmly, ’whether I am about to become a mother.’

‘Ah?’ he answered interrogatively, and then he hummed a fragment of an air.

‘I have lost my husband,’ I was about to add; but suddenly I scorned such a weakness and shut my lips.

‘Since when—­’ the doctor began.

* * * * *

‘No,’ I heard him saying.  ’You have been quite mistaken.  But I am not surprised.  Such mistakes are frequently made—­a kind of auto-suggestion.’

‘Mistaken!’ I murmured.

I could not prevent the room running round me as I reclined on the sofa; and I fainted.

But in the night, safely in my room again at the hotel, I wondered whether that secret fear, now exorcised, had not also been a hope.  I wondered....

PART II

THREE HUMAN HEARTS

I

And now I was twenty-six.

Everyone who knows Jove knows the poignant and delicious day when the lovers, undeclared, but sure of mutual passion, await the magic moment of avowal, with all its changeful consequences.  I resume my fragmentary narrative at such a day in my life.  As for me, I waited for the avowal as for an earthquake.  I felt as though I were the captain of a ship on fire, and the only person aware that the flames were creeping towards a powder magazine.  And my love shone fiercely in my heart, like a southern star; it held me, hypnotized, in a thrilling and exquisite entrancement, so that if my secret, silent lover was away from me, as on that fatal night in my drawing-room, my friends were but phantom presences in a shadowy world.  This is not an exaggerated figure, but the truth, for when I have loved I have loved much....

Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
Sacred and Profane Love from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.