Comic History of England eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 89 pages of information about Comic History of England.

Comic History of England eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 89 pages of information about Comic History of England.

England got no benefit from Richard’s great daring and expensive picnics in Palestine; but of course he advertised Great Britain, and frightened foreign powers considerably.  The taxation necessary to maintain an army in the Holy Land, where board was high, kept England poor; but every one was proud of Richard, because he feared not the face of clay.

John, the disagreeable brother, succeeded Richard, and reigned seventeen years, though his nephew, Arthur, the son of Geoffrey, was the rightful heir.  Philip, who kept himself in pocket-money by starting one-horse rebellions against England, joined with Arthur long enough to effect a treaty, in 1200, which kept him in groceries several years, when he again brought Prince Arthur forward; but this was disastrous, for the young prince was captured and cruelly assassinated by request of his affectionate uncle, King John.

To be a relative of the king in those good old days was generally fatal.  Let us rejoice that times have so greatly improved, and that the wicked monarch has learned to seat himself gingerly upon his bomb-infested throne.

[Illustration:  JOHN CAUSED ARTHUR TO BE CRUELLY MURDERED.]

CHAPTER XII.

MAGNA CHARTA INTRODUCED:  SLIGHT DIFFICULTIES ENCOUNTERED IN OVERCOMING AN UNPOPULAR AND UNREASONABLE PREJUDICE.

Philip called the miserable monarch to account for the death of Arthur, and, as a result, John lost his French possessions.  Hence the weak and wicked son of Henry Plantagenet, since called Lackland, ceased to be a tax-payer in France, and proved to a curious world that a court fool in his household was superfluous.

John now became mixed up in a fracas with the Roman pontiff, who would have been justified in giving him a Roman punch.  Why he did not, no Roman knows.

On the death of the Archbishop of Canterbury in 1205, Stephen Langton was elected to the place, with a good salary and use of the rectory.  John refused to confirm the appointment, whereat Innocent III., the pontiff, closed the churches and declared a general lock-out.  People were denied Christian burial in 1208, and John was excommunicated in 1209.

Philip united with the Pope, and together they raised the temperature for John so that he yielded to the Roman pontiff, and in 1213 agreed to pay him a comfortable tribute.  The French king attempted to conquer England, but was defeated in a great naval battle in the harbor of Damme.  Philip afterwards admitted that the English were not conquered by a Damme site; but the Pope absolved him for two dollars.

[Illustration:  KING JOHN SIGNS THE MAGNA CHARTA.]

It was now decided by the royal subjects that John should be still further restrained, as he had disgraced his nation and soiled his ermine.  So the barons raised an army, took London, and at Runnymede, June 15, 1215, compelled John to sign the famous Magna Charta, giving his subjects many additional rights to the use of the climate, and so forth, which they had not known before.

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Comic History of England from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.