Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 12, 1919 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 54 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 12, 1919.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 12, 1919 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 54 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 12, 1919.

Thursday, February 6th.—­The process, once immortalized by a Lords’ reporter in the sentence, “A few Bishops looked in, swore, and went away again,” went on in both Houses; but in the Commons in a more orderly fashion than yesterday.  For the SPEAKER, ever ready, as he said on his election, “to carry out the old rules in a modern spirit,” directed the waiting Members to form up in line.  One of the Coalitionists evinced a little surprise.  He had always understood that when coupons were issued queues were superfluous.

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[Illustration:  Donald (who a short time before had put the bottle in the cupboard “for another day” breaking long silence). “SAXPENCE FOR YOUR THOUGHTS, SANDY.”

Sandy. “WEEL, I’M THENKIN’ IT’S JEST TWA MEENITS SEN THE CLOCK STRUCK TWELVE—­AN’ IT’LL BE ANITHER DAY.”

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    “Wanted a Certificated (Resilient) Lady Teacher for Std. 
    V.”—­Times of India.

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TENDENCIES

(Being some extracts from the daily Press of, say, 1925).

....  The bi-monthly strike of Clyde workers took place yesterday.  The proceedings were quite orderly.  The matter in dispute this time is a very simple affair.  The men, who are now working on a full half-hour a week basis at one hundred and sixty-eight hours’ pay, with three snap meal-times of ten minutes each per day, are not pressing for any alteration in pay or hours, but demand the dismissal of Mr. John Smith, the managing director of one of the large shipbuilding yards, who rudely refused to fetch a pint of beer for one of the rivetters.  The Government department dealing with strike questions is full up for three months yet, but hopes are entertained that, unless a critical by-election should intervene, it will be possible to deal with the matter at the expiration of that period.

....  Much interest was aroused last evening by the production of a new musical show, both the book and music of which have been written by natives of this country.  A strong protest has been lodged by the United States Embassy.

....  A passenger on one of the Tube railways alleges that he entered a train at Oxford Circus Station last evening.  No confirmation is as yet forthcoming, and the rumour must be treated with reserve.

....  The Peace Conference held a sitting yesterday and definitely decided that the ex-Kaiser should be tried one of these days.  It is confidently stated in the inner circles of Paris that peace will inevitably be concluded within the next ten or twelve years.

....  Dancing still holds its own as the principal amusement of the bulk of the population.  The latest dance, the Guzz-Jinx, which is danced on the hands with the right foot placed in the mouth of one’s partner, is stated to be very graceful indeed.  The correct music is provided by a band performing entirely on hair-combs and tea-trays.

Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, February 12, 1919 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.