The Spectator, Volume 2. eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 1,123 pages of information about The Spectator, Volume 2..
Freeman had promised to come to such a Place.  Upon which the good Lady turned her Softness into downright Rage, and threw the scalding Tea-Kettle upon your humble Servant; flew into the Middle of the Room, and cried out she was the unfortunatest of all Women:  Others kept Family Dissatisfactions for Hours of Privacy and Retirement:  No Apology was to be made to her, no Expedient to be found, no previous Manner of breaking what was amiss in her; but all the World was to be acquainted with her Errors, without the least Admonition.  Mr. Freeman was going to make a softning Speech, but I interposed; Look you, Madam, I have nothing to say to this Matter, but you ought to consider you are now past a Chicken; this Humour, which was well enough in a Girl, is insufferable in one of your Motherly Character.  With that she lost all Patience, and flew directly at her Husbands Periwig.  I got her in my Arms, and defended my Friend:  He making Signs at the same time that it was too much; I beckoning, nodding, and frowning over her Shoulder, that [he] was lost if he did not persist.  In this manner [we] flew round and round the Room in a Moment, till the Lady I spoke of above and Servants entered; upon which she fell on a Couch as breathless.  I still kept up my Friend; but he, with a very silly Air, bid them bring the Coach to the Door, and we went off, I forced to bid the Coachman drive on.  We were no sooner come to my Lodgings, but all his Wife’s Relations came to enquire after him; and Mrs. Freeman’s Mother writ a Note, wherein she thought never to have seen this Day, and so forth.
In a word, Sir, I am afraid we are upon a thing we have no Talents for; and I can observe already, my Friend looks upon me rather as a Man that knows a Weakness of him that he is ashamed of, than one who has rescu’d him from Slavery.  Mr. SPECTATOR, I am but a young Fellow, and if Mr. Freeman submits, I shall be looked upon as an Incendiary, and never get a Wife as long as I breathe.  He has indeed sent Word home he shall lie at Hampstead to-night; but I believe Fear of the first Onset after this Rupture has too great a Place in this Resolution.  Mrs. Freeman has a very pretty Sister; suppose I delivered him up, and articled with the Mother for her for bringing him home.  If he has not Courage to stand it, (you are a great Casuist) is it such an ill thing to bring my self off, as well as I can?  What makes me doubt my Man, is, that I find he thinks it reasonable to expostulate at least with her; and Capt.  SENTREY will tell you, if you let your Orders be disputed, you are no longer a Commander.  I wish you could advise me how to get clear of this Business handsomely.


  Tom Meggot.


[Footnote 1:  See No. 212]

[Footnote 2:  we]

[Footnote 3:  he]

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The Spectator, Volume 2. from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.