Dawn eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 560 pages of information about Dawn.

“Arthur dear, I do not blame you.  Loving her, how was it likely that you should think of love from me?  I only blame myself.  I have loved you, God help me, ever since we met—­loved you with a despairing, desperate love such as I hope that you may never know.  Was I to allow your phantom Angela to snatch the cup from my lips without a struggle, the only happy cup I ever knew?  For, Arthur, at the best of times, I have not been a happy woman; I have always wanted love, and it has not come to me.  Perhaps I should be, but I am not—­a high ideal being.  I am as Nature made me, Arthur, a poor creature, unable to stand alone against such a current as has lately swept me with it.  But you are quite right, you must leave me, we must separate, you must go; but oh God! when I think of the future, the hard, loveless future——­”

She paused awhile, and then went on—­

“I did not think to harm you or involve you in trouble, though I hoped to win some small portion of your love, and I had something to give you in exchange, if beauty and great wealth are really worth anything.  But you must go, dear, now, whilst I am brave.  I hope that you will be happy with your Angela.  When I see your marriage in the paper, I shall send her this tiara as a wedding present.  I shall never wear it again.  Go, dear; go quick.”

He turned to leave, not trusting himself to speak, for the big tears stood in his eyes, and his throat was choked.  When he had reached the steps, she called him back.

“Kiss me once before you go, and I see your dear face no more.  I used to be a proud woman, and to think that I can stoop to rob a kiss from Angela.  Thank you; you are very kind.  And now one word; you know a woman always loves a last word.  Sometimes it happens that we put up idols, and a stronger hand than ours shatters them to dust before our eyes.  I trust this may not be your lot.  I love you so well that I can say that honestly; but, Arthur, if it should be, remember that in all the changes of this cold world there is one heart which will never forget you, and never set up a rival to your memory, one place where you will always find a home.  If anything should ever happen to break your life, come back to me for comfort, Arthur.  I can talk no more; I have played for high stakes—­and lost.  Good-bye.”

He went without a word.

CHAPTER XLVIII

Reader, have you ever, in the winter or early spring, come from a hot-house where you have admired some rich tropical bloom, and then, in walking by the hedgerows, suddenly seen a pure primrose opening its sweet eye, and looking bravely into bitter weather’s face?  If so, you will, if it is your habit to notice flowers, have experienced some such sensation as takes possession of my mind when I pass from the story of Mildred as she was then, storm-tossed and loving, to Angela, as loving indeed, and yet more anxious, but simple-minded

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Dawn from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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