A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 9 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 508 pages of information about A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 9.

ANA.  Hist, hist, Mendacio; I prythee observe Heuresis.  It seems he cannot find his master, that’s able to find out all things.  And art thou now at a fault?  Canst not find out thine own master?

HEU.  I’ll try one more way.  O yes![249]

MEN.  What a proclamation for him?

ANA.  Ay, ay, his nimble head is always full of proclamations.

HEU.  O yes!

MEN.  But doth he cry him in the wood?

ANA.  O good sir, and good reason, for every beast hath Phantasy at his pleasure.

HEU.  O yes!  If any man can tell any tidings of a spruce, neat, apish, nimble, fine, foolish, absurd, humorous, conceited, fantastic gallant, with hollow eyes, sharp look, swart complexion, meagre face, wearing as many toys in his apparel as fooleries in his looks and gesture, let him come forth and certify me thereof, and he shall have for his reward—­

ANA.  I can tell you where he is.  What shall he have?

HEU.  A box o’ the ear, sirrah. [Snap.]

ANA.  How now, Invention, are you so quick-fingered?  I’faith, there’s your principal, sirrah, [snap], and here’s the interest ready in my hand [snap.  They fall together by the ears.] Yea, have you found out scratching?  Now I remember me—­

HEU.  Do you bite me, rascal?

MEN.  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!  Here’s the lively picture of this axiom, A quick invention and a good memory can never agree.  Fie, fie, fie:  Heuresis! beat him, when he’s down?

ANA.  Prythee, let’s alone:  proud jackanapes, I’ll—­

HEU.  What will you do?

ANA.  Untruss thy points, and whip thee, thou paltry ——.  Let me go,
Mendacio, if thou lov’st me.  Shall I put up the—­

MEN.  Come, come, come, you shall fight no more, in good faith.  Heuresis, your master will catch you anon.

HEU.  My master! where is he?

MEN.  I’ll bring you to him; come away.

HEU.  Anamnestes, I scorn that thou shouldst think I go away for fear of anything thou canst do unto me.  Here’s my hand, as soon as thou canst pick the least occasion, put up thy finger, I am for thee.

ANA.  When thou dar’st, Heuresis, when thou dar’st, I’ll be as ready as thyself at any time. [Exeunt MENDACIO and HEURESIS.] This Heuresis, this Invention, is the proudest jackanapes, the pertest, self-conceited boy that ever breathed.  Because, forsooth, some odd poet or some such fantastic fellows make much on him, there’s no ho with him.[250] The vile dandi-prat will overlook the proudest of his acquaintance; but well I remember me, I learned a trick t’other day to bring a boy o’er the thigh finely.  If he come, i’faith, I’ll tickle him with it.

[MENDACIO comes running back in great haste.

MEN.  As I am a rascal, Nam, they are all coming.  I see Master Register trudging hither as fast as his three feet will carry up his four ages.

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A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 9 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.
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