The only danger lies in your tilting your nose at their ways and ideas, and insisting upon your own. That rouses the sense of individuality in them and they then fight for their ways and ideas—then there’s boil and bubble and sputter and flying apart.
Learn to vibrate with people where you can and keep still when you can’t. Look for the little things you can enjoy together, and make light of the others. Recognize their right to differ from you, and REMEMBER that “all judgment is of God”—their judgment as well as yours.
All this differing of judgment among the people of earth is simply God reasoning out things. All the brains God has are your brains and mine. Just as in your brain you reason things for and against, wondering which is right and waiting for time and experience to decide; so God reasons one way through your brain and another and opposite way through my brain, and then rests and observes until the “logic of events” shall show him, and us, the point of real harmony. Just be still and let God think through your brain, and don’t kick up a muss because he thinks out the other side of things through my brain, or your new relatives’ brains.
Toleration is a great thing; but loving willingness to let God think out all sides of a question through all sorts of brains, is a glorious thing. Let’s stand for our point of view when it is called for, but don’t let’s insist upon it. Let’s remember always to use God’s “still, small voice.”
Do I need to tell you that what I have just said applies to you whether you have just married a second time or not? The whole world is our family, you know. Let’s respect it and be kind to it, and trust it to recognize and appropriate our point of view just as far as is good for it. Let’s be more interested in getting at the other points of view than insisting upon our own. That is the way we shall grow in wisdom and knowledge. And, too, that is the way we shall all get close enough together to really see the truth about things.
“I desire to come face to face with the person or persons who are controlling and influencing my husband against his home and children and myself. He has been estranged from us all for several years, although sleeping under the same roof. Once I can find out the person or cause of his actions I can remove the effect, for I shall know just what to do. I want to solve the mystery.”
The chances are you will never find that out, and if you did it would do you absolutely no good. Your husband is no dumb fool to be “influenced” this way or that by two women! He is a man with ideas of his own. If he was disappointed in you as wife, he has possibly turned to some other woman. If so the more you pry and suspect and hint around, the more positively he will turn away from you. If you “found out” and made things warm for him or another he would simply hate and despise you and be the harder set against you. This is the Law.