He had friends, yet often felt estranged from others his age. He was overweight and uncoordinated which contributed to his feelings of unhappiness. "My nightmares ... were always inadequacy dreams. Dreams of standing up to salute the flag and having my pants fall down. Trying to get to a class and not being prepared. When I played baseball I was always the kid who got picked last. 'Ha, ha, you got King' the others would say.
"Without a father I needed my own power trips. My alter ego as a child was Cannonball Cannon, a daredevil. Sometimes I went out West if I was unhappy, but most of the time I stayed home and did good deeds."1
An active imagination coupled with the same day-to-day anxieties and insecurities suffered by many children were part of King's baggage. He went through a period when he harbored fears of suddenly going crazy--walking down the street one minute and totally losing control the next.
Then there were adolescent periods of suppressed violence. Aided by television violence, he became terrified and preoccupied with death--death in general and his own in particular. Convinced he would never see twenty, he fantasized dark deserted streets; strange figures leaping at him from behind bushes.
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